Tag Archives: attitude

Life is More Fun without Expectations

Last Friday was supposed to be our grand date night. Valentine’s day plans. I was disappointed that I didn’t get the reservations that I desired for us. There was a daddy-daughter dinner that we missed out on and I was feeling upset over it. Nevertheless, Chloe is 5. She doesn’t know much about restaurants and city attractions. I was going to make something happen. Good times were ahead.

Along the way we stopped at Target for a couple of things and pair of new slippers that I told her we would shop for. I wanted to hurry. We needed to get moving. We needed a great night, I had it planned, and time was awasting. Let’s move!

3 minutes into the door Chloe yells: “Dad I want pizza!”

“No baby, we’re going to dinner. We have to get out of here.”

That wasn’t good enough. Our discussion continued for about 5 minutes until her precious eyes looked up at me and griped me with the finger that I’m wrapped on.

It hit me!

Chloe wanted fun. I wanted quantity. Spending more, doing more, exerting more effort………that would mean I accomplished something, right? Mega-wrong!!!

Bad expectations and misinformation can lead to the worst results.

So,How did we spend the night?

We sat in the café. We ate pizza, drank juice, and talked. I sat there like a fool, trying to be a dad.

I listened to my daughter. Her play dog’s name is macho, her friend at school has transferred out 😦 , we should shop for a new cereal (pops and honey nut cherios are not her favorite anymore), and we should sing more while we drive.

Simplicity can really make you smile. It’s not about how much money you have, or don’t have. It’s good to evaluate the expectations we carry around, they’re nothing but thoughts turned chains. They hold us back from enjoying the moment. What counts is being present. Present in the NOW. Not existing, but LIVING in the moment.

  • That means letting go of worry….and embracing a little uncertainty as excitement.
  • Listening rather than assuming
  • Most of all…loving! Love never allows you to waste. Love. I say again…LOVE!

The moment you are in NOW is both a present from God and a stewardship that you will never get back. Take a moment to take in everything around you and….listen! You’ll be surprised what happens.



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10 Things You can do Right Now to Guard Your Bright Perspective from Joykillers

The most exotic food I have ever eaten is grilled chicken hearts. They are small, triangular muscles that are hard to chew but you can get it down after a while. I didn’t like it then and I hate the sight of them now! How is it that the same chicken heart that I detest is someone elses favortie snack? 

In foreign lands like Brazil or Taiwan ,where chicken hearts can be a part of everyday meals, people grow up enjoying them, it’s part of their sense of normality. Some people are accustomed to loving what I detest!

I sound like a hater don’t I? 🙂

Each day we interact with people who see life and the world around them as nothing but disgusting.

The sun is too bright, the wind is too cold, and the cars are too loud. They have trained the buds of their imaginative palate to ingest everything as fantasy chicken hearts. Everything is yuck!

Be careful. People like this are toxic and it doesn’t take long before their venom transfers right into your veins. A healthy perspective has to be cultivated and it has to be guarded!

Your perspective is a survival mechanism. It can regulate your blood pressure, calm your mood in a heated situation, and overall keep you from sounding like a real jerk! On behalf of everyone who knows you and is afraid to say it: PLEASE, STOP BEING A JERK! It’s not as bad as you always say it is. Calm down and smell the roses.

Here’s a few tips to keep seeing the best in all situations, (read, do, repeat as needed):

1. Stop everything….check your pocket, purse, or couch cushion for loose change.  Do you have anything? Doesn’t mean much to you? If you have spare change you are among the top 8% of the world’s wealthy

2. Have Kids? This morning a mother somewhere is preparing to bury her child

3. Call your grandfather (or grandmother, grandfather stories are just more epic to me!) ask him about the toughest season of his life. My grandfather told me of an event that tested the fortitude of his soul. He was in the US Army-Air Force during a time when African Americans didn’t always receive the respect that the uniform commanded. He had routine encounters with men who hated him because he was Black. On one occasion, because he had spoken out of line to a white man, an Seagant struck him across the head with a large stick. He told me that all he remembered was feeling warm blood come down his face before he passed out. The man was never charged or penalized. My grandfather didn’t really expect anything to happed. He was a Black man and that’s just how life was. Wow! I’ve never had it that bad! Things have changed.

4. Go to Google Maps. Search “nowhere”…laugh and go ahhh!

5. Look at Chloe making snow angels! awww!

6. Have a girlfriend/boyfriend? At least your not alone.

7. Wish you had a girlfriend/boyfriend? At least you’re doing bad all by yourself! 🙂

8. Right now while you read this there is more activity in your brain than in your expensive pc. You didn’t have to program your breathing, cause your heart to beat, or digest your food. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are not mess, a mistake, or useless……..you can only choose to be!

9. Take a vacation RIGHT NOW!                                                                                                                                                                        Look at a picture like this for at least 45 seconds. Take a deep breath. Smile, repeat. Let you brain breathe!

10. Read Job 40-41                                                                                                                                                                                                   God made everything….without you!  You weren’t there. He didn’t need your help, he’s never asked for it, and He never will. Where were you when he made the seas, the mountains, and all the different species of animals? His wisdom and His methods are FAR beyond your understanding. Just be a creature for once. Understand that you are created, the weight of the world, or your life, doesn’t need to rest on your shoulders!  A good reading of Job eases the worst most battle weary perspectives.

That’s enough to get me started. Sometimes it’s a paused moment alone to pray, other times it’s a nice cup of coffee. At the end of the day it’s up to you to guard your mind and your heart.  You live this life once. The choice to make it exhilarating and meaningful is here now. How you live it all begins with how you see it! Change your perspective, change your life!


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